My blog is moving from nickyhicks.com to nickymartinez.com. My husband surprised me a couple days ago by buying the new domain name and setting wordpress up for me! Thanks to Ricardo, and look for my posts there from now on!
Not a lot to say today. I’m back home, thank goodness, and I’ve been working on unpacking my husband’s stuff for most of the day today (and yesterday, too). We’re down to about five boxes, but I’m running out of places to put stuff! I think I may be looking around soon for things that can be safely stored outside in the storage closet on our balcony. Funnily, the main problem is that our combined libraries need more room than they currently have – which is two full walls in the office and one bookcase out in the hall. Granted, we only have one five-shelf bookcase. The rest are all three shelves a piece, but there are 7 of them!
I’m sure I’ll figure out how to get everything unpacked and in a good place, but it may take some rearranging and I’m probably going to need to purge some of my stuff to make room.
Anyway…so far married life is awesome, despite the challenge of unpacking (and he does help when he gets home from work).
We’ll see how it goes in the next few days! 
For the past few days I’ve been dog and house sitting for a friend of mine and her husband. They have adopted two greyhounds and an Italian greyhound, all of which are rescues. It did take a while for a couple of them to warm up to me, but now it seems that now I’m quite a favorite. The Italian greyhound, Todd, loves everybody so he’s been the one to sleep under the covers with me and hang out with me on the couch the most, but now I also have the larger greyhounds coming over to be petted and hang out in the bed or on the couch.
The interesting thing I’ve discovered is that greyhounds are essentially large cats. One minute they’re ready to prance around and play, but give them a few more minutes and they’re sacked out on the floor ready to nap for the rest of he day.
So, the house sitting has been rather dull. Which is a good thing since it means I’m not fighting off burglars or being overrun by the dogs. In fact, I was hoping to take the puppies out for a walk today, but it’s been raining since last night.
So far, so good – and I’ve just got a couple more days before they get home and then the doggies will be happy to have their family back.
This will be a short one, because it’s rather late in the evening, but I wanted to give a quick update to the site – like my name change – and say hello!
The wedding was splendid. Everything went smoothly even though I forgot to put my veil over my face and one or both of us forgot to grab Ricardo’s wedding band. (He had a “spare” in his pocket!) The reception seemed to go pretty well, though I wish I could have spent more time with everyone one-on-one. One advantage to having limited the guest list: I got to speak to everybody for at least a couple minutes, and everyone was wonderful to both of us. I had no doubts about why people were there. We both felt very loved, though I will admit that by the time it was over…well, I have never been so happy to get away from such a wonderful group of people. We were both pretty tired.
Our photos from the wedding are just amazing, and I can’t wait to get my hands on some copies that I can post online. Right now I have some 4×6″ prints (and someone from the wedding took my favorite one! I saw it at the reception and now it’s not in the stack I have) and film yet to be developed on a set of disposable cameras. The honeymoon pictures are all on my laptop now, though and once I weed out all the dirty pictures once I have some time to babysit the upload I’ll put them up here. There are already several up on Facebook, but it’s a little more complicated to get them in a good format for a blog. (And I’m j/k. We didn’t take dirty pictures. I bet you believed it for a second, though!)
The honeymoon trip was just wonderful…I’m so glad we decided to do a cruise. I don’t think even an all-inclusive resort could have topped our cruise. I miss that ship. The food was great – though I will admit I had some sopes in Cozumel that had me ready to miss our ship – and the level of service everyone on the ship provided was just phenomenal.
Anyway…we’ve been back for a few days now and we’ve been running nonstop since then because I’m trying to get my name changed, and get the apartment ready for Ricardo’s move-in. He has essentials here, but I’m sure he’d like to bring along things like the rest of his clothes, some of his furniture, and of course his computer. We’ve already set up my “old” bedroom as the office for the two of us – I’ll have to take a picture of all our bookshelves – and the only thing I think it lacks is a nice comfy reading chair.
Once things settle down, expect some pictures and some posts – and possible some site redirection since I can no longer accurately be called Nicky Hicks.
The closer we get to the wedding, the more solid the plans become – and the more nervous I get! It’s not just a “What if something goes wrong?” type of nerves, and it’s definitely not doubts about getting married to Ricardo, but it’s definitely what some would call cold feet.
I just keep thinking…I don’t know how to be a wife! What if I SUCK? Ricardo is frighteningly assured that I will be a great wife so I have to ask myself if maybe, just maybe, he has brain damage.
I know on the abstract knowledge kind of level that marriage isn’t going to make him suddenly demanding and me into a magical blend of supermodel and homemaker extraordinaire, but I still can’t help being nervous! He’s marrying me for exactly who I am right this second, and that’s great. Right brain is satisfied. Left brain is dancing in little circles of panic, saying “But you’ve never DONE this before? How can you possibly be good at it if you’ve never even done it before? You don’t know what it’s going to be like AT ALL. You can’t even stand having a room mate and now you want a husband! That’s all day every day sister!”
I know…left brain should shut up. But I can’t find duct tape for brains. 
I’m hoping this will get better. All I know so far is that nobody seems to have the magic words that will click for left brain and make me calm about this all. Wouldn’t you know I wouldn’t be typical and worry about something going wrong with the wedding, or if I’m doing the right thing by getting married. Oh no, I’m just worried I’ll be bad at being married.
Getting married, I’m totally cool with. It’s after that I worry about. I’m hoping that the magical solution to this will be the honeymoon. We’re cruising Royal Caribbean for seven days, room service is included, dinner’s at 8 every evening, and all the destinations are awesome. I’m hoping that time away from home, and technology, will help.
Though I have to admit Ricardo and I have started to think the honeymoon should come right -before- the wedding. All the planning is getting us both pretty stressed. We’ve started telling everyone we know to elope. Trust me, people, elope! If you ever ever ever want to get married just elope. Go to Vegas. Or have a destination wedding. Heck, get married on a cruise ship – ours has a chapel on board. One-stop shop. Marriage. Honeymoon. Done.
Anyway…I’m sure it will be fine and I’ll be fine (or at least right brain is) so don’t worry about me or anything. Just…for those of you who will be at the wedding…lock the chapel doors, okay?
It seems like all the piece are finally starting to fall into place. There’s a lot of stuff still to be done, but it’s mostly little details that need to be planned at this point – like who’s driving whom to where, what the program will say, and what music we want – etc.
We’ve decided to go with a CD of music for two reasons:
1) It’s cheaper
2) Plans sort of aren’t working out to find a live musician that can play what I want
Anyway…it’s all coming together and I couldn’t be more relieved.
I would apologize for not updating in a while, but it isn’t really negligence that has kept me away so much as being busy and having a healthy sense of self-preservation. Right now I’m wide awake from a combination of Excedrin Migraine (caffeine helps the body pick up the pain killers) and relief because my migraine is gone.
As usual, I have about three hundred things on my mind, not the least of which is how to break the news of my upcoming wedding – and figuring out how much I can complain about it before people start telling me to suck it up.
The wedding will be in April and – due to the fact that Ricardo and I are paying for it ourselves – there won’t be that many people invited. I have to say that it’s actually going to complicate things to keep it small, but inviting more people means much more money than we can afford to gather. A lot of people are going to be offended by this. I just have that feeling.
The thing is, if I invited everyone who wants to be at my wedding then we’d never be able to afford the wedding in the first place. Not to mention that there are some people who would want to be at my wedding whose attendance would make me angry or upset – which isn’t the kind of memory I want to make on that day.
Still, there are several people I love who aren’t invited just for the simple fact that we had to draw the line somewhere so we wouldn’t be overwhelmed by the cost. We don’t want financial help and truthfully we don’t even want wedding presents – we just want to get married and hopefully everyone can be happy for us whether they’ve received an invitation or not.
The other issue is that, among the emotional/mental pitfalls of dealing with some of the complicated familial relationships we have, there have been people who have always disapproved of our relationship in general. I’ve heard reasons varying from racial differences, cultural differences, presumed religious differences (we’re both Baptist, though, so that was off the mark), the age difference between us, the presumed “experiential” difference between the two of us – and so on. The fact of the matter is, the events that shaped the two of us over the course of our lives to this point have shaped us to be excellent partners, best friends, and contributed to a near-sickening degree of romance. I’m not a romantic-type person, but I promise I could make you gag with the sweetness-and-light type of descriptions that come to mind when I think of my husband to be.
Also, I’m not blind to his faults nor he to mine. We’re pretty fault-ridden people, being mortal and all, and we have thus far managed to cope without resorting to violence. 
Those faults can still make it frustrating, though. I am, for starters, cynical, impatient, and I like to have everything planned to a frightening degree. I tend to overshare, overthink, and create problems where none really exist. I won’t talk about his faults, because if he wanted you to know them, he’d tell you. Mine, however, have turned the wedding planning into a nightmare.
I’m terrified the whole thing is going to blow up in my face and I’ll be miserable for the rest of my life, living alone in a tiny apartment with a slew of cats as my only company. I keep having this vision in my head of me, in my not-yet-altered wedding dress (which is about two feet too long), standing at the front of the chapel with the wedding papers in my hand…totally alone.
February is almost over and we have yet to have an officiant, a wedding program, a reception location, a honeymoon destination, a wedding cake, and any number of smaller details. The thing is, this isn’t my wedding, it’s our wedding and this is one of those situations where I can’t really just push my sleeves up and take the helm myself. I have to consider what he wants, because the day should be good for him, too.
Honestly, for all the fuss, I’m not sure I really care about the wedding so much as I care about the act of getting married. I’ve found the one person I’m willing to spend the rest of my life with, no matter what may come, and I don’t think that ten or fifteen years for now I’m going to dwell overmuch on whether or not the wedding was picture-perfect and executed without a hitch. I’m going to care about whether or not it happened.
Right now, that’s my biggest fear: that the wedding won’t happen, despite the fact that we’ve sent out invitations and reserved a chapel. In fact, we’re going to see the chapel tomorrow for a tour – we’ve seen it from the outside and since it’s mostly glass on the outside we’ve seen the inside, we just haven’t actually been inside yet to walk around and look at the little details.
It sucks.
I’d love to be excited and giddy, but I can’t muster it. Ricardo’s strength is that he’s a detailed planner. No stone is left unturned when he’s planning to do anything, and he investigates like a pro. He has ideas about everything, valuable input and feedback, and because of that I’m sitting there, impatiently tapping my foot and thinking “Let’s get the show on the road, already!” I like to think I’m just as thorough as he is, but faster. (Which is probably not true.)
I’m just one of those people that, once I’ve made up my mind about something, I make it happen. So while I may be slow to make a decision, and talk you to death with wishy-washy details, I’m a full-speed-ahead kind of gal once I know what I want. Ricardo gets things done with more surety, and he won’t speak until he’s about ready to make his final decision.
That difference in approaches has never really seemed like a stumbling block until I was hit with the prospect of jointly planning a wedding. If it was up to me, we would have gone out to buy all the little accessories and set everything up for the officiant, reception, cake, dress alterations, etc. in about two weeks and then coasted into April having to deal only with the most minor of details.
Instead we’re about at the halfway point and all we really have firmly set is the location for the ceremony. I’m about ready to snap. Unfortunately, I have enough sense to realize that not only would snapping at Ricardo not solve anything, but it wouldn’t be productive and honestly he doesn’t deserve it. There’s no real excuse for me to be churlish. The stress has been created by my own overheated imagination and the fear that this – like so many other things in my life – is going to go down in flames despite my efforts to shore up the edges and make it work.
Can we say “control issues?”
I know! I’m terrible. >.< It’s one of the reasons I’m blogging about this, though. I need to vent somewhere before I explode – and really exploding all over my fiance might be the best way to get the opposite result from what I want. In the end, that leaves my wringing my hands and wondering what to do. At my best, I think about the fact that I love my fiance and he loves me, and we’re best friends so we’ll get through this. At my worst, I think of him as a male version of Scarlet O’Hara looking at the wedding as saying continuously, “I’ll think about it tomorrow.”
Of course that’s unfair of me. I’m actually starting to hate myself quite a bit because I never imagined I’d be so bitter over something that should be making me happy. I don’t think I’ve gone Bridezilla, because I just can’t make myself feel invested in the wedding when nothing is happening, but something has definitely gone screwy.
My biggest worry, though, after the actual planning, is the guest list. People are going to be hurt or upset or angry because they aren’t invited and I’m not sure how to handle that. If I invited everyone who would want to come it would be a nightmare, and not just logistically. Somehow, though, people in general don’t seem to get that. They think (and I’ve seen a few remarks like this) “Well I understand you can’t invited more than an allotted amount of people, but surely I should be invited since I love you/like you so much/know you so well/am related to you/care about you/have known you for x amount of years/want to do something nice for you…”
Well, I’ve looked at the numbers and I’ve looked at the people in my life , and I’ve made hard decisions which while they may seem callous even to those who are on my guest list, have a hefty amount of reasoning behind them. Ricardo has even suggested that I make it easier by telling people it was him who objected to them coming to the wedding, but I just don’t think it’s right to hide behind him. We both worked on the guest list, and he isn’t a tyrant. I just hope people will respect my decisions and not hassle me about them. It didn’t fail to invite someone because I forgot about them, or discounted them, or have decided do denounce them, or because I don’t love them, or out of maliciousness.
I had to consider the following:
1) How much money do we have in our budget? (i.e. How many people can we afford to feed at a reception, including wedding favors, wedding cake, etc.?)
2) How far would our guests have to travel to get here? (Also, how much would it cost them, and how much notice would they need?)
3) Who is it that has played the biggest role(s) in my life/our lives? (It sounds sort of mean, but really does it make sense to invite someone who is more acquaintance than friend – or who you remember as always making you miserable when you were a kid?)
4) Does this person respect us and our relationship? (This is, unfortunately, an issue. I refuse to invite anyone who does not offer respect to myself or my future husband. It would be farcical to invite someone disrespectful to my wedding.)
5) Will this person want to come out of affection or obligation? (Or just for a party?)
It sounds like a harsh list even to me, but it’s a reasonable list, too. If you think about it on a personal and practical level, it’s sensible.
One of my best friends had a huge wedding – bigger than she even wanted because her mom was footing the bill and therefore felt entitled to influence almost everything – and she ended up inviting a family member who had the ill-mannered arrogance to actually approach her and her new husband at the reception and tell here about what a b**** she was. Dear God I do not want that at my wedding! You know you have family members who would say things like that to you at your wedding, or make an inappropriate toast speech, or do something that would either make you angry, or make you want to cry.
My approach is to avoid that possibility.
That doesn’t mean everyone who isn’t invited is seen as a potential social disaster – there are actually a few people that I haven’t invited who mean the world to me, but whom I felt for various reasons shouldn’t be asked to attend. In some cases it’s because I don’t really keep in touch with this person, because they would have to travel a long distance, because travel is expensive and I wouldn’t be able to offer assistance or a place to stay – or simply because it’s someone who may feel closer to me than I feel to them. I don’t doubt that there are more people out there who love and care about me than will be present at my wedding, but I’ve had to consider practical issues (like money) with a very serious eye toward not beggaring us in the first days of our marriage just to have the wedding that other people expect.
I do hope people will understand that, and not hold it against me. However, I’m a pretty hard person and my attitude is that if someone were to decide the lack of an invitation is an unpardonable insult to them that ends our relationship, then I’m not too interested in the relationship anyway. It’s one thing to keep up the mutual give-and-take of a healthy relationship, and another thing entirely to think that a relationship requires groveling for forgiveness for transgressions, versus willing forgiveness of an unintentional slight. I will grant that I’m not an easy friend to have because of that attitude.
In any case…I’ll try and update about wedding progress for those who want to follow along or offer support. It’s more likely to drive me nuts than anything I’ve come across thus far.
Well, it’s been long enough since my last update, but not much has changed. I’ve finally gotten back to updating my book review blog, NeoLibarium, and I’ve gotten back to reading some of my newer books instead of rereading the same ones over and over again. I may have a reread relapse, though, because I’ve been sick the past couple days and comfort reading is the ticket for me when I can’t do much of anything else….I did manage to slap together a sandwich for Ricardo to eat for lunch today, but then he made me a bowl of soup, a cup of hot tea, set the table, got the napkins, and brought us some snacks. I have the feeling that I would’ve been more helpful staying out of the way. I’m always slow-thinking when I’m sick, and today has been no exception. I woke up late because Ricardo told me via text message he was on his way for lunch, and after getting up and dressed and making it to the couch I was ready to go back to bed and sleep. Anyway, I’ll stop whining. I’ve been trying not to be a bad patient, since Ricardo’s taking care of me (and last time I was sick I think he was ready to shoot me and put us both out of our misery). Apparently I’m doing something right ’cause he told me today I’m being a good patient. I think it may be ’cause I’m exhausted and I can’t talk much. 
My cat has been cuddle-kitty pretty much all day now that I don’t feel good. I’ve heard him running around playing at night, but it’s like he knows I don’t feel good and is determined to keep me company during the day when I’m resting. It’s one of the reasons, in general, that I love having pets – they seem to understand when their owner is not feeling good, whether physically or emotionally, and they respond to that in ways that can only make you feel a little better. Granted, I got my cat because I wanted to give an animal a stable home with all the things needed to be healthy and balanced, but nobody can deny the emotional bond they have with their pet. Sometimes those little furry “people” understand us better than we understand ourselves.
Back to the reading thing – I am going to try to read some new books, if for no other reason than to keep updating NeoLibrarium – but it’s sort of difficult to get into any heavy reading since my head feels so muddled. I want to read The Name of the Wind, by Patrick Rothfuss. The trouble is I’m afraid once I start I won’t be able to concentrate enough. If that’s the case then my next few reviews will either be books I’ve already read, or on romance novels, since those tend to be easy reads for me. I’ve read very few romance novels where the plot is so intricate that I have to really concentrate hard to keep track of what’s going on…and that may be my speed right now.
Anyway, I feel like I’m rambling and I can’t really keep to the thread of what I wanted to say, so I’ll just post this and hope you’ll excuse my ramblings. Hope you are all feeling better than I am, and run into some good reading soon!
Like always, I need to update more often and I’m way behind. I’d like to blame life being crazy, and that wouldn’t be a lie, but in reality I think it’s just that I’d rather update when I feel like it than update because I think I should. So there’s that out of the way.
Most people celebrate the New Year with a lot of optimism. Those who know me realize that I am not what you would call an optimist. I consider myself a realist, but most people tell me I’m a cynic.
I spent the New Year at home, watching tv with my fiance, munching on a little snack platter, and drinking sparkling grape juice (which comes in nice little fake wine bottles so the teetotalers can feel adventurous). It was nice because I am not a big fans of crowds, cold whether, or fireworks in my ear (sensitive ears x.x I love fireworks, but not the noise).
It was a great way to bring in the New Year. Of course, if it weren’t for my fiance, I would have spent it asleep. I can’t say why, but as I’ve gotten older and lived more on my own I just seem to care less and less about the things that most people make a big deal out of.
Christmas is good, and I like giving presents, but it doesn’t feel me with the same glee that it did – not just when I was a kid, but as recently as a few years ago. New Year’s lost the shine after I left Odessa, I guess. I just have this thing now – Valentine’s Day, Easter, Labor Day, 4th of July, etc – where I sit down and think “Why do we celebrate this day? What’s the big deal? Why does it matter and who cares if we *don’t* celebrate?” I mean, tomorrow isn’t going to be any better for a barbecue and some fireworks today. I still go out and do things, but I find my enthusiasm waning and now the only thing I find enjoyable is being with Ricardo or some friends, watching them have fun.
My birthday has definitely lost the fun factor, but that started when I still lived at home. It was like I hit 15 and birthdays started sucking. People are still great on my birthday – cards, presents, good wishes – but even though that’s the only day I still get semi-excited about it gets more disappointing every year because fewer people seem to care. (To the people who are nice on my birthdays, and you know who you are, that doesn’t mean I am not appreciating what you do for me – it means a great deal to me.)
So, why am I such a year-round Scrooge? Truthfully, I don’t know. I think I’m just at a stage in my life when I’m looking at everything critically and analytically, which results in a lot of “What’s the big deal?”
At this point even my wedding – still haven’t set a date, btw – is not a big deal to me. I mean, yes it’s a very good thing and I want to get married, but I’m looking forward more to the part where I get married than what dress I’m wearing and where it is and who’s there, and all that. I’m leaning more and more towards, “You know, Vegas has drive throughs for that.”
Ricardo wants to give me a nice wedding, and if I’m honest with myself I wanted to have a nice church wedding. Now, though, I’m not big on the trappings. Later on I may care more than I do at this moment, so I’m hoping I can get through making plans. On the bright side, while we’re making plans for the wedding, I probably won’t get hysterical if everything isn’t perfect because my focus is on the commitment I’ll be making, not the surroundings in which that takes place.
Besides, I have to give my Uncle David and Aunt Liz dibs on sticking their finger in the wedding cake since that’s what I did to them.
Anyway, I’m not sure I had a point with that, but does anyone else know what I’m talking about?
Lastly, I’d like to know how you all spent the New Year. Mine was quiet, and good, but I know some of you ventured out of your homes for the celebration and like I said, I like to see (stories count) other people enjoying themselves.
As for New Year resolutions – I’ve picked a classic: lose weight. Before anyone panics, don’t worry I can afford to lose weight. When I left high school I was 117, mostly ’cause I had P.E. that semester and they worked us pretty hard. My first few years of college I was 120 – good when you’re 5′3″ with a slight build. Now I’m pushing the 140s so I’m gonna try and exercise that away over the next few months. It’ll be easier on me in the long run since I’ve already got a crap set of knees. They don’t need to haul any extra weight around.
Exercise is pretty much the whole of my plan, too. My eating habits have always been pretty healthy, but now that I’m not walking across college campuses and nobody’s around to make me run laps in the morning it’s time for me to start hitting the gym.
If anyone has suggestions for making that less boring, let me know. They have tv there, and I usually listen to music, but the main reason I don’t go to the gym is because I find it dead boring.
Anyway…that’s my ramble for the day. Be assured that I’m alive and well, if a little chubby in the middle
Happy New Year, everyone. I hope you all had fun, and that you’ve got something to look forward to.
About a week (or more) ago I was involved, peripherally, in a conversation/argument/debate between an atheist and a Christian of uncertain denomination.
I realized during this conversation, as I reflected on similar conversations I’ve heard and snarky remarks I’ve heard before, that atheists and many other non-Christians are without a doubt the most close-minded, arrogantly stubborn, and largely misinformed group of people I’ve ever come across.
I know that these complaints are usually lodged against Christians, and I’ve even listened to some that I think are complete nut-balls.
Unfortunately, the most intolerant and mean-spirited comments I’ve ever heard were made by either atheists or wiccans (or some similar brand of belief) and directed at Christians.
It irritates me more than I can say.
I’ve never seen anyone go for hard-core conversion harder than a non-Christian trying to talk a Christian out of their faith.
I’ve never come across anyone less willing to listen to reason – not faith or even doctrine, but logic – than an atheist bent on being right.
The one thing that really gets me though, is their sanctimonious position that sounds like this: “I’ve done RESEARCH” (implication: you backwoods bible-thumpers can barely tie your shoelaces)or “I’ve read through the entire Bible and I’ve never seen _______” (implication: I’ve read through the Bible ready to dismiss every single word and not looking too closely at studying it, but since I made it from cover to cover I know more than you)
or even better “You can’t prove God exists” (implication: If you can’t prove it, then it’s impossible. My suggestion: talk to historians and the can give you a list of impossible things; even better, talk to a scientist)
or “What about the Inquisition?” (Implication: Some bad people were in power and used Christianity as a vehicle for their hatred; therefore you’re all evil. Suggestion: If that’s true then why are we nice to Germany? Or anyone in the Middle-East? Russia? Italy?)
or “Faith is just a cop-out.” (implication: You’re ignorant, and since I can make you look weak, that makes me right)
Another thing: the “darwin” fish – taking a Christian symbol and basically defacing it to make your little joke. How is that okay? Really? How is it okay to take my beliefs and mock them on your BUMPER for everyone to see?
I can guarantee you, if I took a symbol of faith from any other religion and played with the image to make a joke, and stuck it on my car and left it in a Wal-Mart parking lot – I’d come back to find my windows smashed, my tires flat, and a lawyer ready to sue me for every penny that could be wrung out of my hide. But because you’re mocking Christians, it’s okay, right?
I don’t think so. You’re lucky Christians are, by and large, people who are desperately trying to be good. Otherwise, I’d be happy to slash your tires. What prevents me from doing that? My faith, so don’t bash it ’cause it’s what protects you from the wrath of me.
I can give you that some Christians are frighteningly zealous. I’ve even run into some people that take one excerpt from the Bible, use it out of context, and use that twisted basis of faith for hate-mongering, isolationism, and all kinds of things that I just don’t get.
But by and large, you should be grateful for Christians, even if you aren’t one. You’d be surprised how many of your modern-day morals come from Christianity. Oh, I’ve heard all sort of arguments denying it, but don’t even start. You may have done “research,” and I could argue with you about that all day. Trust me, if America hadn’t been founded by Christians, your life would probably suck right now in ways you can’t even imagine. If Christians weren’t taught to be compassionate and forgiving, the world would be in trouble.
I can’t force anyone to believe in God. I can’t make you see the light. I can’t even really lead by example because, believe me, I am one of the most flawed people you will ever meet.
But don’t mock my faith, don’t mock my God, don’t disrespect my brothers and sisters in Christ, and be grateful that when I hear your puss-filled remarks that faith keeps me from showing you exactly how angry I am at your ignorant lies. Be grateful that my God has taught me forgiveness.
My God is the reason I can listen to these conversations and stay cool, why I can listen and not attack, why I can rationalize and plead with you to believe, to consider, to research -truly research, to study the Bible, read books by believers instead of manuals designed to shred faith in God. That’s why I can sit down next to you, find in you something lovable, and ask you to be my friend instead of losing my temper and showing you the most horrible side of human nature.
Think about THAT, because I can guarantee you it’s not me that reigns in my temper. That’s Divine Intervention. That’s a miracle that you can’t quantify. God making me a better person.
